Mr U had got himself into a seriously troubling life situation, and was stuck in a cycle of worry and concern. The stress and anxiety was bleeding into his behaviour, and causing cascade after cascade of troubles and concerns. This lead to self-generated isolation and borderline depression (though this was not diagnosed or medicated).
Mr. U was stuck in a cycle, and could not see a way out. The troubling life situation was out of his control, but things that were in his control, were being left to the wind. Nothing seemed to be going right. Nothing felt good. Mr U was desperate for the situation to be resolved, and for life to start offering some kindness. Which he felt like he deserved.
A number of avenues and subjects were explored:-
- Firstly ascertaining where they wanted to be.
- Exploration of the feelings he was feeling. Where that was, and what it did for him.
- A build-up of trust between the client and coach, so that conversations could be open, honest and serve the client.
- Encapsulation & definition of the feelings, so that can be identified. Along with this, the thought patterns that either trigger the emotions, or are triggered by them.
- Directing the client to accept the situation (facts of life). Exploring how the attention on the negative situation in his life were not serving him.
- Exploring what they could do. What positive things they could do that were in their control.
- Exploring subjects around things that they did enjoy.
- Creating action around these.
- Reflecting on how this effected them and served them.
Mr U made great progress. Though the main troubling situation is still not resolved (this is completely out of his control), and rolls along at its own pace, it does not consume his whole life. He is able to enjoy days, with family and friends. Even the way he talks now, has an element of confidence and joy in it. There are more smiles and they find more moments to enjoy. There are still bad days, but this is something the coaching explored as well. The client has a set of tools to identify the thought patterns that show up from time to time, and to address them in a way that gets them back to a more constructive and positive place in themselves.